Ask a Question - or - Return to the Spiritual Warfare Forum Index

Question Title Posted By Question Date
Child involved in the bad friends Catherine Saturday, September 15, 2007

Question:

Dear Bro Ignatius
I hope that you're well. My daughter is fifteen years of age and a spiritual child. She attends Mass on Sundays and makes a holy hour in front of the Blessed Sacrament weekly.

At school she has many "emo" friends. Some of them cut themselves or threaten to cut themselves. She has a friend who has cut the pentagram into himself a few months ago. Just recently he carved this into his bed head. He then went to sleep and said a hideous creature tried to strangle him. He also says it has asked him to buy an ouja board so that it can talk to him. My daughter told him that he is to cease this behaviour at once. He has said he would think about it.

I have told her that she should no longer associate with him if this continues. He is a victim of physical abuse. The school tried to intervene but the parents threatened to pull him out of the Catholic School they attend. I prayed that they would let him stay and even put the intention on this site and the parents had a change of heart. I went to purchase a scapular and St Michael medal for him and my daughter today but the store was closed.

I am at wits end with the friends my daughter has made. She has become a sad child who has at times threatened self harm and asked me to get her professional help. I need some guidance. I believe that I cannot turn my back on this boy and his domestic situation is a mess. I want to contact his mother but am afraid to do so. She has failed to protect him from his father so far. I have to protect my child as she is my responsibility.

Will you please advise me on what prayers may be needed. I will also ask my parish priest to offer a Mass for this situation. I have prayed for so long that she would give up being part of this group. They have a really negative perception of everything and are taunted to harm themselves at school. Please pray for all of us in this situation.

God Bless you and I look forward to reading your reply.



Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM

Dear Catherine:

Your subject got truncated so I just guessed at "Child involved in the bad friends."

It sounds like you have a wonderful daughter, but she is placing herself at great risk hanging around this negative crowd. I have no idea what "emo" friends are, but this crowd you describe is bad news.

Your daughter needs to understand that if she hangs around a negative crowd it will rub off on her. I know teenagers think they are invincible, but one cannot walk in mud without getting mud on your shoes.

St. Paul specifically tells us to avoid bad associations. In Matthew 10:12-14 we are told to "shake the dust" off our cloths and leave a person who will not listen to Truth.

Most of the problems of ancient Israel were directly related to them disobeying God on the issue of not "hanging" around sinful peoples and nations. We WILL be influenced by the company we keep.

Your daughter did the right thing in telling that boy to stop his behavior, but she needs to stop hers.

If she has asked for professional help, then you need to give it to her. It sounds like she recognizes that she is in trouble. DO NOT IGNORE her request.

Hopefully, you can talk to her about why hanging around the wrong crowd is damaging to her personally and spiritually. If she is a spiritual person, I imagine she knows that her spiritual life has suffered because of her associations. Appeal to her spiritual sense.

She also needs to remember the commandment to honor parents, and St. Paul's admonition for children to obey their parents. If she disobeys you about not hanging around this crowd then she is disobeying God. When she goes before God in prayer how will she explain to God her disobedience? the God who said, "I prefer obedience to sacrifice."

The Saints did not disobey their parents. In fact, several women saints when they were your daughter's age wanted to enter religious life. Their parents refused permission. They obeyed. Later God convinced the parents to give permission. God honors obedience.

Love cannot exist without obedience. 1 Corinthians 13 tells us that "love does not demand its own way." In the Gospel of John Jesus tells us that if we love him we will obey his teachings.

If she loves you, if she loves God, then she needs to respect and obey your wishes. God honors obedience.

As for the boy, if you think the boy is in danger then call social services; they can investigate. You personally intervening is likely to be a disaster waiting to happen.

As for prayers, pray the prayers in our SW prayer catalog: Prayer for our Children, the Hedge Prayer of Protection for the Household, and for your daughter, and Rebuking Particular Spirits. The spirits that need rebuking are, for example, the spirit of depression, spirit of cutting, spirit of suicide, spirit of "whatever" -- identify the spirits by the attributes you observe.

We will certainly be in prayer for you, your daughter and family, this boy and his family, and all concerned.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

 


For information on how to receive help see our Help page. We suggest that before contacting us directly for help you try the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance. These self-help steps will often resolve the problem. Also our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog contains many prayers that may be helpful. If needed you can ask for a Personal Consultation.