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Question Title	Posted By	Question Date
Lingering Pain	Ryan	Sunday, May 12, 2013
Question: Hello, I am writing on a somewhat personal note for the sake of trying to clear up any potential spiritual warfare issues inherent in what I am about to communicate. For brevity, I will explain as succinctly and quickly as possible. I was abandoned by my father at around two years of age, and he did not return. Ever since childhood I have never recovered from this horrible wound, and as the years go by the symptoms and extensions of it (perpetual nervousness, severe mood swings, extremely low self-conception, intense feelings of guilt, thoughts of suicide, fear of impending doom/death etc) seem to get worse. Now, at 23 years of age, it is particularly egregious as I am more complex than ever and as such experience intense narratives that play over and over in my head and create such a picturesque version of my own life and self that I sometimes do not even know what reality truly is or how I can even be considered "human" in the context of the insanity of the thoughts that endure like a train. I am living a Catholic life now that consists of solemnly praying three rosaries a day, attempting to attend daily Mass when I can, and frequently doing my best to avoid any and all sin (mortal and venial). I do feel close to God to a certain degree, and certainly feel hope in Him despite these horrible and persistent episodes. However, without a doubt I am extremely disturbed, and I suspect that demons are really out to get me and use what already seem to be real psychological phenomena to drive me deeper and deeper downward. The result is that I feel overwhelmed and alone in my struggles despite the Blessed Mother's protection and the awesome Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. I am afraid that the devil is taking advantage of the weaknesses that are already present and contributing to my thought patterns to make me more and more in a self-loathing state that would bring me closer to sin. Sometimes I indeed do fall into grave sin as a result of some of these episodes. I feel cornered and internally lacerated, and have no idea what to do on a spiritual level to address what appear to be additional attacks. Is there any insight to provide on this? I appreciate it.
Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OMSM(r), CCL, LTh, DD, LNDC Dear Ryan: I am sorry that you are experiencing this. The first thing you need to do is to forgive your father. That one issue, unforgiveness, will be the engine of all other psychological and spiritual problems. Demons will certainly exploit this. The symptoms you describe as precipitated from your father's abandonment suggests a need for psychological counseling, but also suggests a bondage cause by unforgiveness. I would advise that you follow the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance, linked below, with special attention to the Step on forgiveness. The pdf file on forgiveness will explain what forgiveness is. Most people have problems with forgiveness because they really do not know what is involved in forgiveness. In addition, be sure to rebuke any spirits, identified by their attribute, such as the spirit of perpetual nervousness, the spirit of severe mood swings, the spirit of extremely low self-conception, the spirit of intense feelings of guilt, the spirit of suicide, the spirit of fear of impending doom/death etc. Rebuke these spirits each and every time they come to your mind. If these thoughts happen 100 times a day, then rebuke them 100 times a day. A spontaneous rebuking prayer can be simple, such as, "I rebuke you spirit of ___________. Father in heaven take this spirit away from me, allow only good thoughts in me, and give me a spirit of __________ (opposite spirit, suich as the opposite of spirit of suicide is a spirit of life, of low-esteem the opposite is love of self according to the Great Commandment, of mood swings the opposite is stability in my moods and mind, of feelings of guilt the opposite is love of God to forgive us, of spirit of fear of doom is the spirit of trust in God, etc.). Also go to our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog, linked below, to find a Hedge Prayer of Protection, Prayer to Control Thoughts, and a formal Rebuking prayer. Correct your thinking errors. For example, guilt is a good thing to lead us to repentance. If we have guilt for a forgiven sin it disordered and a sign of lack of trust in God and his love to forgive us. Trust in God's promise. His promise on this subject is 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and will forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." God is not a liar, he keeps his promises. Thus, once we confess our sins, God forgives us of those sins and cleanses us. The sin no longer exists. How dare will not forgive ourselves or feel guilty about something of which God has not only forgiven us, but has washed us squeaky clean. Do we take a shower for dirt that has already been washed from our body? No. Do not feel guilty for dirt that has already gone down the drain and no longer exists. We will pray for you. God Bless, Bro. Ignatius Mary For information on how to receive help see our Help page. We suggest that before contacting us directly for help you try the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance. These self-help steps will often resolve the problem. Also our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog contains many prayers that may be helpful. If needed you can ask for a Personal Consultation.

Question Title

Posted By

Question Date

Lingering Pain

Ryan

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Question:

Hello, I am writing on a somewhat personal note for the sake of trying to clear up any potential spiritual warfare issues inherent in what I am about to communicate. For brevity, I will explain as succinctly and quickly as possible. I was abandoned by my father at around two years of age, and he did not return. Ever since childhood I have never recovered from this horrible wound, and as the years go by the symptoms and extensions of it (perpetual nervousness, severe mood swings, extremely low self-conception, intense feelings of guilt, thoughts of suicide, fear of impending doom/death etc) seem to get worse. Now, at 23 years of age, it is particularly egregious as I am more complex than ever and as such experience intense narratives that play over and over in my head and create such a picturesque version of my own life and self that I sometimes do not even know what reality truly is or how I can even be considered "human" in the context of the insanity of the thoughts that endure like a train.

I am living a Catholic life now that consists of solemnly praying three rosaries a day, attempting to attend daily Mass when I can, and frequently doing my best to avoid any and all sin (mortal and venial). I do feel close to God to a certain degree, and certainly feel hope in Him despite these horrible and persistent episodes. However, without a doubt I am extremely disturbed, and I suspect that demons are really out to get me and use what already seem to be real psychological phenomena to drive me deeper and deeper downward. The result is that I feel overwhelmed and alone in my struggles despite the Blessed Mother's protection and the awesome Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. I am afraid that the devil is taking advantage of the weaknesses that are already present and contributing to my thought patterns to make me more and more in a self-loathing state that would bring me closer to sin. Sometimes I indeed do fall into grave sin as a result of some of these episodes. I feel cornered and internally lacerated, and have no idea what to do on a spiritual level to address what appear to be additional attacks. Is there any insight to provide on this? I appreciate it.

Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OMSM(r), CCL, LTh, DD, LNDC

Dear Ryan:

I am sorry that you are experiencing this. The first thing you need to do is to forgive your father. That one issue, unforgiveness, will be the engine of all other psychological and spiritual problems. Demons will certainly exploit this. The symptoms you describe as precipitated from your father's abandonment suggests a need for psychological counseling, but also suggests a bondage cause by unforgiveness.

I would advise that you follow the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance, linked below, with special attention to the Step on forgiveness. The pdf file on forgiveness will explain what forgiveness is. Most people have problems with forgiveness because they really do not know what is involved in forgiveness.

In addition, be sure to rebuke any spirits, identified by their attribute, such as the spirit of perpetual nervousness, the spirit of severe mood swings, the spirit of extremely low self-conception, the spirit of intense feelings of guilt, the spirit of suicide, the spirit of fear of impending doom/death etc.

Rebuke these spirits each and every time they come to your mind. If these thoughts happen 100 times a day, then rebuke them 100 times a day. A spontaneous rebuking prayer can be simple, such as, "I rebuke you spirit of ___________. Father in heaven take this spirit away from me, allow only good thoughts in me, and give me a spirit of __________ (opposite spirit, suich as the opposite of spirit of suicide is a spirit of life, of low-esteem the opposite is love of self according to the Great Commandment, of mood swings the opposite is stability in my moods and mind, of feelings of guilt the opposite is love of God to forgive us, of spirit of fear of doom is the spirit of trust in God, etc.).

Also go to our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog, linked below, to find a Hedge Prayer of Protection, Prayer to Control Thoughts, and a formal Rebuking prayer.

Correct your thinking errors. For example, guilt is a good thing to lead us to repentance. If we have guilt for a forgiven sin it disordered and a sign of lack of trust in God and his love to forgive us. Trust in God's promise. His promise on this subject is 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and will forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

God is not a liar, he keeps his promises. Thus, once we confess our sins, God forgives us of those sins and cleanses us. The sin no longer exists. How dare will not forgive ourselves or feel guilty about something of which God has not only forgiven us, but has washed us squeaky clean. Do we take a shower for dirt that has already been washed from our body? No. Do not feel guilty for dirt that has already gone down the drain and no longer exists.

We will pray for you.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

For information on how to receive help see our Help page. We suggest that before contacting us directly for help you try the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance. These self-help steps will often resolve the problem. Also our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog contains many prayers that may be helpful. If needed you can ask for a Personal Consultation.