Dear Amanda:

I am sorry to hear about your problems. There are still two non-spiritual issues that may be causing this. You did not have on your list Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. CFS can have the symptoms you describe. I have CFS myself and am on a VA disability pension partly because of that.

Depression can also be a part of CFS. In addition, depression does not necessarily have the symptoms sadness. You can be "happy, a glass-half-full type" person and still be depressed.

I would recommend a diagnostic workup for Chronic Fatigue and also for depression.

On the spiritual side of things, Acedia (sloth) or even demonic oppression can be possible. These are two separate conditions, and both are distinct from CFS or depression, though can be similar in symptomology.

Acedia/Sloth

Acedia has two categories of symptoms: somatic and psychological. From your description you do not appear to have somatic symptoms (sleeplessness, pain in joints, etc.). You are reporting psychological symptoms of Acedia (lack of motivation to household tasks, forgetfulness, laziness, etc.).

Acedia is actually a precursor to Sloth. Sloth is a spiritual laziness. The Catholic Dictionary defines sloth:

Sluggishness of soul or boredom because of the exertion necessary for the performance of a good work. The good work may be a corporal task, such as walking; or a mental exercise, such as writing; or a spiritual duty, such as prayer. Implicit in sloth is the unwillingness to exert oneself in the performance of duty because of the sacrifice and the effort required.

As a sin, it is not to be confused with mere sadness over the inconvenience involved in fulfilling one's obligations, nor with the indeliberate feelings of repugnance when faced with unpleasant work. It becomes sinful when the reluctance is allowed to influence the will and, as a result, what should have been done is either left undone or performed less well than a person is responsible for doing.

Sloth may also mean a repugnance to divine inspirations or the friendship of God due to the self-sacrifice and labor needed to co-operate with actual grace or to remain in the state of grace.

This kind of laziness is directly opposed to the love of god and is one of the main reasons why some people, perhaps after years of virtuous living, give up on the pursuit of holiness or even become estranged from God.

How to Cure Acedia/Sloth?

The Sisters of St. Benedict in Rock Island, Illinois give this advice for those suffering from Acedia or Sloth:

The spiritual masters agree, the cure for acedia is work.

 

“John Cassian advised his monks about what to do when plagued with thought of acedia,” writes Mary Margaret Funk, OSB, in Thoughts Matter. “If we listen carefully there is wisdom in his words for us. He told them to rededicate themselves to work in every sense. Work with your hands and be present to the work, he said, rather than dissolving into memories or thinking about desires and dreams.”

 

For a monastic, work also means going to community prayers in a routine that is repeated day in and day out. That routine, seen as mind-numbing by one afflicted with acedia, is actually redemptive.

 

“Could we regard repetition as a saving grace…?” writes Kathleen Norris in Acedia and Me. “Browning ground turkey while your children are arguing in the kitchen, you may not feel connected to this great mystery, but you are. … Our greatest spiritual blessings are likely to reveal themselves not in exotic settings but in everyday tasks and trials.”

 

Thus, to combat acedia, we must work at our jobs faithfully, and let go of negative thoughts. “Someone once said, You have to wind the clock every day or it will wind down,” Sr. Susan says. “Our work – our prayers – is how we wind the clock. We aren’t here for just ourselves. Our life is not just me and God on my pathway to heaven. Our life is about who and what we have committed ourselves to. We have to recommit to this life every day, not to the life we don’t have. Our prayers help us wind the clock, help us recommit.”

 

And as we recommit, we can celebrate as Ronald Rolheiser’s child of the kingdom who “turns up her music, picks up her wineglass and her friends, her tools and her duties, her hopes and her prayers, and continues, in joy, despite all that's wrong, the dance of the resurrection.”

In other words, get off your bum and be active in doing something. The cure for any laziness is activity. Often this will be like going to the lake to swim. We poke our toe in the water and find it too cold. But, if we take the plunge we enjoy ourselves after the initial shock of the water temperature. We acclimate to the water and then have fun and wonder why we ever hesitated.

Melinda Selmys, in an article in the National Catholic Register, called Resistance to Acedia Calls for Fight, Not Flight, Part 3 of a 3-part series on sloth, advises:

The only cure for acedia is moral effort. “It is proved by experience that a fit of acedia should not be evaded by running away from it, but overcome by resisting it” (St. John Cassian). Here are some ways to offer that resistance:

Mind your own business. Make sure you know what your responsibilities are and that you are fulfilling them. The Church Fathers list “curiosity” among the daughters of acedia, because the soul that is sick with itself often tries to make up for its failings by criticizing and interfering in the lives of others.

Choose. Many people spend years trying to be sure which way to go before they say Yes to a vocation or make important decisions in life. Don’t worry about this. Commend your life to God, and then set out.

Identify first things. If you are too busy to get around to the things that really matter to you, re-prioritize.

Forgive. This is not the same as forgetting. It means recalling the past to mind and making peace with it.

Set small goals. You probably won’t become holy all in one go. Settle for a realistic measure of progress. Be content when you fail.

Practice being present. Pay attention to your life. Don’t go through the day on autopilot. If you’re playing with the kids, invest yourself in the game. Look at the world. Look at God when you pray.

Work your leisure. Don’t just vegetate. Make sure you have real rest time and use it to develop the parts of your personality that aren’t employed in your daily work.

Be still. Self-knowledge and prayerfulness require silence. Turn off the TV and the cell phone. Rest in God.

Don’t accept your own excuses. Contemplate whether your self-justifications will fly at the Last Judgment. If you’re not sure, run them by God.

Persevere. If you hear yourself whining “But I tried that, and it didn’t work,” it’s probably time to try again.

The bottom line: Resist acedia, and it will flee.

Parts 1 and 2 are also worth a read:

Part 1: Christ’s Easy Yoke Can Cure the Avatar Blues
Part 2: Why We Work So Hard to Avoid Hard Work

The Cure does not happen overnight. You must persevere. Perseverance is the key to the whole Christian life.

You must do the things you need to do despite not feeling like it. You may feel like a hypocrite doing things you do not want to do, but you do them anyway. You may feel like a great burden in our your shoulders to get up and clean house or do whatever else you need to do. Do it anyway.

Assuming there is no clinical depression, CFS, or other medical or psychiatric condition, in time, the dread will go away eventually, but only if you persist in your resistance to sloth and persevere through the "withdrawal" from sloth. Resist sloth, and it will flee.

The Demonic Factor

We must be careful to avoid the excuse of "the devil made me do it" or think that there is "a devil around every corner." We can get ourselves into great messes all by ourselves without any help of the devil.

With that said, the devil certainly does try to influence us to make bad decisions, even decisions that will lead us into bondage and oppression. Sometime we are attacked by the devil for no particular reason. Evil can be utterly arbitrary. Most often, however, demons do not cause problems, but hitchhike on problems that already exist. They love to stick their finger in the wound and twist. Demons are specialist in making things harder than they have to be.

The solution to this, however, does not require us to figure out which came first, the chicken or the egg, the problem or the demons. The solution is to live the best Christian life possible, the Sacramental and devotional life, and to avail oneself of spiritual warfare prayers and techniques when needed.

In that regard, I recommend that you go through the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance, linked below, and to use whichever prayers are useful to you from the Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog, also linked below.

Of particular note is the Rebuking Particular Spirits prayer. You can rebuke the spirit of sloth, or any other spirit, identified by its attribute (e.g., lust, anger, laziness, depression, fatigue, etc.). The Hedge Prayers of Protection is another one I would recommend.

Concerning Unwanted Sexual Thoughts and Desires

As these other problems subside so likely will the unwanted thoughts and desires. The old says, "Idle hands is the devil's workshop", also applies to the mind.

When we are fatigued, depressed, lazy, slothful, idle, stressed-out, etc. the mind can work overtime with sexual and other unwanted thoughts. As St. Paul teaches us we must "take every thought captive to obey Christ" (2 Corinthians 10:5b).

We do this by self-discipline. That is, to rebuke these thoughts when they happen, engage our minds in other matters, be physically as well as intellectually active.

A prayer to help control thoughts can be:

In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, strengthened by the intercession of the Immaculate Virgin Mary, Mother of God, of Blessed Michael the Archangel, of the Blessed Apostles Peter and Paul, and all the Saints and Angels of Heaven, and powerful in the holy authority of His Name, I reject and rebuke this thought and feeling of [list for describe thought/feeling] which is contrary to God’s will. I choose only thoughts in harmony with the Holy Spirit, and I cover my thought life with the blood of the Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.

To rebuke any demons who may be contributing to these thoughts, the Rebuking Particular Spirits in the Catalog linked below should be said.

Because of your history and current problems I highly recommend the Seven Steps to Self-Deliverance mentioned earlier.

The combination of the advice given on how to cure sloth, and this spiritual approach to take care of any demonic aspect to the sloth should help you to heal. If there are no medical or psychiatric reasons for your condition, over a period of time of following the advice given here, you do not find relief then you may want to contact us for formal deliverance counseling.

We will be praying for you.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary