Dear Kevin:

Welcome back to the Church.

You do not need to confess sins that your wife committed. Your wife sterilizing herself because she thinks she knows better than God about her fertility is her sin.

But, if you encouraged her to be sterilized or helped her to have the procedure then you may need to confess that since that is being an accomplice to your wife's sin. I would suggest confession also if you did not protest your wife's intention and actions in this.

Now that the deed is done, and you confess any part you had in her doing this (encouraging it, facilitating it, or not protesting it), it is morally OK for you to have normal marital relations with your wife.

As for your 13 year old daughter, I have no idea. These days, about all a parent can do is to ride out the tidal wave of the teen years :)

Seriously, I would certainly be firm about you desire for her to come to Mass. You can try to reason with her on the spiritual reasons she needs to come before God and worship him in Mass. But, if your wife is the way you describe this task is made unbearably harder.

I am not sure that "making" her go against her will is productive or wise. Instead you need to let her know how you feel about it, be firm about asking her to come with you to Mass, and then PRAY, PRAY, PRAY.

I would suggest a devotion to St. Monica who prayed for years for her wayward son. Her perseverance won out eventually. Her son, St. Augustine, finally came back to the Church and became one of the greatest Saints in the history of the Church.

Also, here are two prayers that you may want to pray often:

Prayer for our Children

We bow humbly before You, heavenly Father, to pray for our children,     [names of children], and for our whole family. We bring our children and our family before You in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ.

We thank You, Lord, that You love     [names of children]    and our entire family, with the love of Calvary. We thank You that You have given our children to us to love and nurture in Christ.

We ask You to forgive us together as parents, and each of us alone in our roles as father and mother, for all our failures to guide our children in the way they ought to go. Help us Lord to be the parents You want us to be; that we may train our children in Your ways, that we may model the Christ-life before them, so that when they grow-up they will love You and live for You.

Accepting our position through You of having "divine power to demolish strongholds" (2 Cor. 10:4) that come into our family, we ask You Father to bring all the work of the Lord Jesus, strengthened by the intercession of the Immaculate Virgin Mary, Mother of God, of Blessed Michael the Archangel, of the Blessed Apostles Peter and Paul, and all the Saints and Angels of Heaven, and powerful in the holy authority of His Name, to focus directly against the powers of darkness that do now or may later bother, influence, and bind     [names of children]    and our family in any way; and specifically against     (name specific areas of troubles or problems).

We pray that You shall bring the victory of our Lord's incarnation, crucifixion, resurrection, Ascension, and glorification directly against all of Satan's power brought against us in our family and specifically in the lives of     [names of children]    . We ask You heavenly Father to bind up all power of darkness set to destroy our children, or our family, and we loose     [names of children]    , and this family, from the influence and harassment of Satan and his demons, in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ.

We invite the blessed Holy Spirit to move in hearts of     [names of children]    that they may know the truth as they are able at their age. We invite the blessed Holy Spirit to move in our hearts and to convict us of sin, of righteousness, and of our responsibility as parents to raise our children in Your name.

We plead the blood of Christ over     [names of children]    and this family. We claim for us a life yielded to serve the true and living God in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.

 

For a Wayward Catholic

Father, We abandon into Your Hands all those who are away from the Church, and all those separated from Your true Church, especially ___________. Do with them what You will, for we know You are a merciful God. Whatever You do, we thank You. Make each of us ready for all that You have for us, to accept all that You desire in us. Let only Your will be done in us and in all your creatures -- We wish no more than this O Lord. Into Your hands we commend the souls of the wayward and the separated from Your Church, especially ____________. We offer them to You with all the love of our hearts; For we love You, Lord, and we so need to give ourselves, to surrender ourselves, into Your hands without reserve and with boundless confidence, for You are our Father. Amen.

Hedge Prayer for a Wayward Person

[The Prayer of Hosea is one of the most powerful prayers in the arsenal of spiritual warfare -- the Hedge Prayer. Hosea had a wife who was committing adultery and running around on him. Hosea was convinced that he not divorce her but to pray for her return. This prayer is particularly useful in praying for a wayward spouse, child, or friend who has gone astray from the Faith and from God, has left to lead an improper life, and/or is estranged from the proper relationship they should have with you.

It should be noted, as it is with all prayer, the Hedge Prayer is not a magic bullet. There are no guarantees that the person prayed for will return. We must always remember that God has given his children the freedom to choose -- even the freedom to choose wrongly. No one, not even God, may force a person against their will to do anything. God, however, is a mighty persuader and although He will not intrude upon one's freedom to choose the course of one's own actions, He may provide the person with great incentive, motivation, and circumstances to help them decide to come back to the place they should be.

For she said, 'I will go after my lovers, who give me my bread and my water, my wool and my flax, my oil and my drink.' Therefore I will hedge up her way with thorns; and I will build a wall against her, so that she cannot find her paths. She shall pursue her lovers, but not overtake them; and she shall seek them, but shall not find them. Then she shall say, 'I will go and return to my first husband, for it was better with me then than now.' --Hosea 2:5b-7]

Trusting in the promise that whatever we ask the Father in Jesus' name He will do, I now approach You Father with confidence in Our Lord's words and in Your infinite power and love for me and for     [person's name]     and with the intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary, Mother of God, the Blessed Apostles Peter and Paul, Blessed Archangel Michael, the guardian angels of myself and     [person's name]    , with all the saints and angels of heaven, and Holy in the power of His blessed Name, as ask you Father to send forth Your Spirit to convict     [person's name]     and to allow him to see any and all wrongs that he has done and how they offend Your infinite goodness.

Father I ask in sorrow, knowing that You do not intrude upon free will, but that You can give Divine Influence like you did with Hosea's wife, that You send a hedge of thorns and wall around     [person's name]     so that he cannot find the paths that lead him away from You and from me and our     [i.e. friendship, relationship, etc.]    .

Though he shall pursue his     [i.e. lifestyle, sinful ways, etc.]    , with this Hedge about him he will not succeed to     [i.e. practice improper lifestyles, engage in sin, etc.]    ; though he shall seek     [i.e. improper lifestyles, sin, etc.]    , he shall not find     [i.e. his desired lifestyle, the sin that draws him, etc.]    ; that no matter what path or what     [i.e. lifestyle, sin, etc.]     he seeks he shall not find satisfaction or happiness until he returns to You and to me, his     [i.e. friend, girlfriend, parent, etc.]     where he may then be taught by Your Holy Spirit the true meaning of     [i.e. friendship, family, etc.]    , and to be a good and loving     [i.e. friend, child, etc.]    , and to know the ways of righteousness and true     [i.e. friendship, family, etc.]    .

Father, I am powerless against these spiritual forces and recognize my utter dependence on You and Your power. Look with mercy upon me and upon     [person's name]    . Do not look upon our sins, O Lord; rather, look at the sufferings of your Beloved Son and see the Victim who's bitter passion and death has reconciled us to You. By the victory of the cross, protect us from all evil and rebuke any evil spirits who are attacking or influencing us in any way. Send them back to Hell and place a wall of protection around this     [i.e. friendship, family]    . Send your Holy Angels to watch over us and protect us.

Father, all of these things I ask in the most holy name of Jesus Christ, Your Son. Thank you, Father, for hearing my prayer. I love You, I worship You, I thank You and I trust in You. Amen.

These prayers from from our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog. There may be other prayers in the Catalog that may be useful to you.

We shall certainly be in prayer for you and your daughter and entire family.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary