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Question Title Posted By Question Date
What can I do? Mary Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Question:

Hello love your site, Im writeing because my grand father refuses to attend a non Trentadine(sp?) mass. I wouldnt worry but its the sspx mass he attends not an indult. His opinion is like this. Novus Ordo women dress like whores for mass, its in the vernacular thats talking to your neighbor not God V2 was a death sentence for the faith etc. I love the man dearlt he raised me since I was 15 and Id hate to see him die outside the Church. Dont get me wrong hes not a kook. Hes very well versed in scripture and church history and doctrine. He refuses to read any thing published after 1960(doctrine wise). Id just like some advice on how to handle this intelligently I dont think antones ever tried that before.

yours in Christ
Mary

Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM

Dear Mary:

This is a hard one. From my experience there is little one can do with a person set-in-his-ways in disobedience to the Church over pre/post Vatican II issues.

Jesus said that if we love him we will follow his teachings. One of his teaching is that we are to obey the Church. If we do not, then we really do not love Jesus no matter how much we say we do. One can have a loveless obedience, but it is impossible to have a disobedient love.

For people like your father pride is a major stumblingblock. They love their preferences and opinions more than they love the Church, it seems. The pride in this becomes a delusion. Some even digress into what I think is a form of mental illness in saying that we have no Pope, and haven't had a Pope since 1958. This scrupulosity is a form of mental illness, in fact. It is obsessive-compulsive disorder.

I am speaking generally, of course, but I have met many people like your father. My success in encouraging them to be obedient to the Church and rational in their thinking is, so far, ZERO.

I have asked people in this situation if they wish to leave Jesus alone with the abusers? If the Mass is valid, Jesus is there with the liturgical abusers and the improperly dress women. Do we want to leave our Lord alone with these people? I think not. Rather, if we stay in the parish we can be an example to others and can pray directly for the paster. We can offer the suffering we feel by having to endure such abuses up to God for the conversion of those liberal priests.

But, do this requires humility and self-sacrifice. These are two virtues that people who disobey do not have. Mother Teresa once said, "To Love is to suffer because you will not suffer for that which you do not love."

While you can try to encourage him to offer up his suffering to God and remain in obedience, what you will likely need to focus on is prayer. Pray that he will be healed of his pride and arrogance. Pray that he will repent of disobedience. Pray that his eyes will be open the the calling of God to be in His Church.

He has set himself up against the Church and has become a wayward Catholic. The following prayer is written for wayward Catholics.

  • Hedge Prayer for Return of Wayward Person

    [The Prayer of Hosea is one of the most powerful prayers in the arsenal of spiritual warfare -- the Hedge Prayer. Hosea had a wife who was committing adultery and running around on him. Hosea was convinced that he not divorce her but to pray for her return. This prayer is particularly useful in praying for a wayward spouse, child, or friend who has gone astray from the Faith and from God, has left to lead an improper life, and/or is estranged from the proper relationship they should have with you.

    It should be noted, as it is with all prayer, the Hedge Prayer is not a magic bullet. There are no guarantees that the person prayed for will return. We must always remember that God has given his children the freedom to choose -- even the freedom to choose wrongly. No one, not even God, may force a person against their will to do anything. God, however, is a mighty persuader and although He will not intrude upon one's freedom to choose the course of one's own actions, He may provide the person with great incentive, motivation, and circumstances to help them decide to come back to the place they should be.

    For she said, 'I will go after my lovers, who give me my bread and my water, my wool and my flax, my oil and my drink.' Therefore I will hedge up her way with thorns; and I will build a wall against her, so that she cannot find her paths. She shall pursue her lovers, but not overtake them; and she shall seek them, but shall not find them. Then she shall say, 'I will go and return to my first husband, for it was better with me then than now.' --Hosea 2:5b-7]

    Trusting in the promise that whatever we ask the Father in Jesus' name He will do, I now approach You Father with confidence in Our Lord's words and in Your infinite power and love for me and for     [person's name]     and with the intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary, Mother of God, the Blessed Apostles Peter and Paul, Blessed Archangel Michael, the guardian angels of myself and     [person's name]    , with all the saints and angels of heaven, and Holy in the power of His blessed Name, as ask you Father to send forth Your Spirit to convict     [person's name]     and to allow him to see any and all wrongs that he has done and how they offend Your infinite goodness.

    Father I ask in sorrow, knowing that You do not intrude upon free will, but that You can give Divine Influence like you did with Hosea's wife, that You send a hedge of thorns and wall around     [person's name]     so that he cannot find the paths that lead him away from the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church under the current Pope; and though he shall pursue his disobedience, he will not find freedom of soul; though he shall seek his own opinions, he shall not find peace in his spirit; that no matter what path he seeks he shall not find satisfaction or happiness until he returns the True Church where he may then be taught by Your Holy Spirit the true meaning of love, obedience, and trust in God's appointed Magisterium, and to know the ways of righteousness and true obedience.

    Father, I am powerless against these spiritual forces and recognize my utter dependence on You and Your power. Look with mercy upon me and upon     [person's name]    . Do not look upon our sins, O Lord; rather, look at the sufferings of your Beloved Son and see the Victim who's bitter passion and death has reconciled us to You. By the victory of the cross, protect us from all evil and rebuke any evil spirits who are attacking or influencing us in any way. Send them back to Hell and place a wall of protection around man. Send your Holy Angels to watch over us and protect us.

    Father, all of these things I ask in the most holy name of Jesus Christ, Your Son. Thank you, Father, for hearing my prayer. I love You, I worship You, I thank You and I trust in You. Amen.

     We will be in prayer for you and your grandfather.

    May God bless,
    Bro. Ignatius Mary

    P.S. Do not fear for your grandfather's soul. Offer his soul up to God. God knows his heart and although he is disobedient, it is likely that God will consider the  mitigating factors. God is merciful and loving. He does not wish anyone will perish. While He will not intrude on a person's free will, He will give us all every chance in the world and will consider every mitigating circumstance to allow us to remain in His friendship forever.

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