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Question Title	Posted By	Question Date
Sexual Thoughts	John	Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Question: I have been dealing with scrupulisity for many years. While I believe I have made progress in dealing with my condition, the area of sexual thoughts continues to be a recurring problem for me. I find myself having the same thoughts over and over. Although I try to avoid becomming aroused by these thoughts, I seem to be constantly trying to "re-experience" the thoughts in an attempt to definitively determine that they were/are not sinful. I'm treating this as a compulsion brought on by my scrupulosity and not mortally sinful. However, I constantly worry that I may be making some mistakes in my determinations that these thoughts are not sinful. In an effort to fight the compulsion, I am continuing to receive Communion without first going to Confession. However, I discuss the problem when I do go to Confession. In addition to discussing my scrupulosity in Confession, I also subscribe to the Scrupulous Anonymous Newsletter, as well as referring frequently to Ligouri Pub.'s pamphlet, "Helps for the Scrupulous." I have also sought spiritual direction on several occasions and plan to do so again. I would appreciate your assessment on how I'm handling this problem and would welcome any suggestions you might have. Thank you.
Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM Dear John: A fleeting thought of a sexual nature is not a sin in-and-of-itself. But rumination over the thoughts, entertaining them, indulging them becomes sinful. On thing you need to STOP doing immediately is trying to "re-experience" the thoughts. You are asking for trouble in doing that. In fact the attempt to "re-experience" the thoughts is what can take an otherwise fleeting thought into a sinful thought. The idea is to not cultivate, obsess, or indulge the thoughts. Rather recognize that fleeting thoughts are just fleeting thoughts and allow them to fleet their way out of your mind. One medical remedy is using a drug like Zoloft. This drug is useful to people with obsessions and compulsions (scrupulosity is a religious form of obsessive/compulsive disorder). I recommend to people who have sexual addictions to check with their doctors about perscribing this drug or something similar. It can work very well for some people helping them to control there thoughts. Pre-occupying your mind with something else can also be helpful. If you are beginning to think something inappropriate try focusing on something else; preoccupy your mind with other activities and thoughts. This will take practice, but it can work in training yourself to avoid inappropriate thoughts. Staying away from the near occasion of sin is a must. Stay away from the beach where near-naked woman hang out, avoid watching movies with sex and nudity scenes, etc. The bottomline is self-discipline. You have to work at it. At a resturant when the watress comes over to your table force yourself to look only at her eyes when talking to her and look down to the table to avoid looking at her. This might sound silly, but if that is what it takes then that is what it takes. You might also think about joining a support group like the one on this website called, Catholic Support Group for Sexual Addiction Recovery. Prayer, of course, is the central core of trying to control your thoughts and capture them for Christ. But most of us will always have fleeting thoughts. Even St. Teresa of Avila had problems with sexual thoughts until she ask God to give her the gift of perfect chastity of mind. Oh, how it would be nice to have that gift! God Bless, Bro. Ignatius Mary Footer Notes: This forum is for general questions on the faith. See specific Topic Forums below: Spiritual Warfare, demons, the occult go to our Spiritul Warfare Q&S Forum. Liturgy Questions go to our Liturgy and Liturgical Law Q&A Forum Liturgy of the Hours (Divine Office) Questions go to our Divine Office Q&A Forum Defenfing the Faith Questions go to our Defending the Faith Q&A Forum Church History Questions go to our Church History Q&A Forum

Question Title

Posted By

Question Date

Sexual Thoughts

John

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Question:

I have been dealing with scrupulisity for many years. While I believe I have made progress in dealing with my condition, the area of sexual thoughts continues to be a recurring problem for me.

I find myself having the same thoughts over and over. Although I try to avoid becomming aroused by these thoughts, I seem to be constantly trying to "re-experience" the thoughts in an attempt to definitively determine that they were/are not sinful.

I'm treating this as a compulsion brought on by my scrupulosity and not mortally sinful. However, I constantly worry that I may be making some mistakes in my determinations that these thoughts are not sinful.

In an effort to fight the compulsion, I am continuing to receive Communion without first going to Confession. However, I discuss the problem when I do go to Confession.

In addition to discussing my scrupulosity in Confession, I also subscribe to the Scrupulous Anonymous Newsletter, as well as referring frequently to Ligouri Pub.'s pamphlet, "Helps for the Scrupulous." I have also sought spiritual direction on several occasions and plan to do so again.

I would appreciate your assessment on how I'm handling this problem and would welcome any suggestions you might have. Thank you.

Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM

Dear John:

A fleeting thought of a sexual nature is not a sin in-and-of-itself. But rumination over the thoughts, entertaining them, indulging them becomes sinful.

On thing you need to STOP doing immediately is trying to "re-experience" the thoughts. You are asking for trouble in doing that. In fact the attempt to "re-experience" the thoughts is what can take an otherwise fleeting thought into a sinful thought.

The idea is to not cultivate, obsess, or indulge the thoughts. Rather recognize that fleeting thoughts are just fleeting thoughts and allow them to fleet their way out of your mind.

One medical remedy is using a drug like Zoloft. This drug is useful to people with obsessions and compulsions (scrupulosity is a religious form of obsessive/compulsive disorder). I recommend to people who have sexual addictions to check with their doctors about perscribing this drug or something similar. It can work very well for some people helping them to control there thoughts.

Pre-occupying your mind with something else can also be helpful. If you are beginning to think something inappropriate try focusing on something else; preoccupy your mind with other activities and thoughts. This will take practice, but it can work in training yourself to avoid inappropriate thoughts.

Staying away from the near occasion of sin is a must. Stay away from the beach where near-naked woman hang out, avoid watching movies with sex and nudity scenes, etc.

The bottomline is self-discipline. You have to work at it. At a resturant when the watress comes over to your table force yourself to look only at her eyes when talking to her and look down to the table to avoid looking at her. This might sound silly, but if that is what it takes then that is what it takes.

You might also think about joining a support group like the one on this website called, Catholic Support Group for Sexual Addiction Recovery.

Prayer, of course, is the central core of trying to control your thoughts and capture them for Christ.

But most of us will always have fleeting thoughts. Even St. Teresa of Avila had problems with sexual thoughts until she ask God to give her the gift of perfect chastity of mind. Oh, how it would be nice to have that gift!

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

Footer Notes: This forum is for general questions on the faith. See specific Topic Forums below:
Spiritual Warfare, demons, the occult go to our Spiritul Warfare Q&S Forum.
Liturgy Questions go to our Liturgy and Liturgical Law Q&A Forum
Liturgy of the Hours (Divine Office) Questions go to our Divine Office Q&A Forum
Defenfing the Faith Questions go to our Defending the Faith Q&A Forum
Church History Questions go to our Church History Q&A Forum