Dear Robert:

It is possible for any two or more people to be friends with each other regardless of sexual orientation or gender.

The book, "Defending a Higher Law" does not say that true friendship is not possible between two homosexuals. That book explains that the form of true friendship that leads to conjugal love is not possible for them.

In a footnote in the book the authors explain:

When we say that homosexuals do not truly love, we are referring only to the erotic homosexual passion and not to other types of love such as filial love, brotherly love and so forth, which have nothing to do with homosexuality.

Non-erotic and non-romantic friendship is defined as "a person whom one knows, likes, and trusts." This platonic friendship is possible between homosexuals or between a homosexual and a heterosexual to the degree in which the persons can trust each other and give of themselves.

Male homosexuals, especially, often seem to have ego and narcissistic personalities that would limit their ability to form genuine friendship as it would be any one with those personality traits.

Bottomline: platonic friendship has nothing to do with homosexuality and thus homosexuals can truly have friendships based upon brotherly love.

As for your spiritual director, I would recommend finding another priest. As you describe this priest's opinion on homosexuality he is not thinking with the mind of the Church.

Homosexuals are not generally "born" with this condition and many homosexuals have succeeded is being healed from this disorder. For your priest to not support the "Courage Apostolate" because they help homosexuals to overcome their disorder is cruel, bigoted, and unChristian.

Here is the Church's statement on homosexuals (from the Catechism):

2357 Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity, tradition has always declared that "homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered." They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved.

2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.

2359 Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary