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Question Title	Posted By	Question Date
Upcoming Marriage & Pseudo RCIA	Mitzi	Tuesday, December 7, 2004
Question: Hello! I am getting married in September of 2005 to a Catholic man. I was raised Jewish, but my family consists of nuns, priests, and rabbis due to the mixed marriage of my parents (my father converted to Judiasm to marry my mom, but his family is Roman Catholic)--that's the background information. I met my fiance about 3 years ago and began attending church with him. This past October we discovered a sacramental preparation class at a new Catholic church and I have been attending the class, but more of an audit of the class rather than actual participation. (The class is at a Catholic center of a college which we do not attend.) However the nun in charge of the class said that she would write whatever letter I need for reception into the church when I feel that it is right for me to convert. So essentially I'm taking RCIA without expecting to receive the sacraments this coming Easter. So here's my question. Will our marriage be considered a sacrament even though I will not be Catholic at the time of the marriage? I know that we have to receive a dispensation from the Bishop to get married which is complicated by the fact that I am not baptised. I plan on converting to Catholocism because I feel that I have been called to the Church through my fiance and it feels right for me. However, I am weary about converting before the marriage because my parents do not know that I am considering conversion... which is kind of silly that I have not told them (my mother would be the only one upset by this)... but I don't think that I should hide my faith from her forever. I just don't want to upset her since she has advanced multiple sclerosis. I guess that I don't want her to see me accept the Eucharist which would let her know that I have converted. That's my dilemma. I figure that after the marriage (Easter of 2006) I could be received into the church.
Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM Dear Mitzi: In order for a marriage to be sacramental both parties must be validly baptized. If one of the parties to the marriage is Catholic then the marriage must also be a "Catholic" wedding (consent given before a Catholic minister). If one party is not Christian, then the Bishop must grant a dispensation. When this dispensation is granted then the Catholic can marry a non-Christian and it will be considered a valid and recognized marriage, but not sacramental. This, at least, is how I understand it for a case like yours. So, get the dispensation from the Bishop, arrange with the Priest to have a Catholic Wedding (which can be done outside of a Mass I believe), get married. As long as all Catholic laws are followed, then your marriage will be valid and recognized in the Church. Then once converted and baptized your marriage will become sacramental, but check with the pastor to see if anything needs to be done to recognize your marriage as fully sacramental. God Bless, Bro. Ignatius Mary Footer Notes: This forum is for general questions on the faith. See specific Topic Forums below: Spiritual Warfare, demons, the occult go to our Spiritul Warfare Q&S Forum. Liturgy Questions go to our Liturgy and Liturgical Law Q&A Forum Liturgy of the Hours (Divine Office) Questions go to our Divine Office Q&A Forum Defenfing the Faith Questions go to our Defending the Faith Q&A Forum Church History Questions go to our Church History Q&A Forum

Question Title

Posted By

Question Date

Upcoming Marriage & Pseudo RCIA

Mitzi

Tuesday, December 7, 2004

Question:

Hello! I am getting married in September of 2005 to a Catholic man. I was raised Jewish, but my family consists of nuns, priests, and rabbis due to the mixed marriage of my parents (my father converted to Judiasm to marry my mom, but his family is Roman Catholic)--that's the background information.

I met my fiance about 3 years ago and began attending church with him. This past October we discovered a sacramental preparation class at a new Catholic church and I have been attending the class, but more of an audit of the class rather than actual participation. (The class is at a Catholic center of a college which we do not attend.) However the nun in charge of the class said that she would write whatever letter I need for reception into the church when I feel that it is right for me to convert. So essentially I'm taking RCIA without expecting to receive the sacraments this coming Easter.

So here's my question. Will our marriage be considered a sacrament even though I will not be Catholic at the time of the marriage? I know that we have to receive a dispensation from the Bishop to get married which is complicated by the fact that I am not baptised. I plan on converting to Catholocism because I feel that I have been called to the Church through my fiance and it feels right for me.

However, I am weary about converting before the marriage because my parents do not know that I am considering conversion... which is kind of silly that I have not told them (my mother would be the only one upset by this)... but I don't think that I should hide my faith from her forever. I just don't want to upset her since she has advanced multiple sclerosis. I guess that I don't want her to see me accept the Eucharist which would let her know that I have converted.

That's my dilemma. I figure that after the marriage (Easter of 2006) I could be received into the church.

Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM

Dear Mitzi:

In order for a marriage to be sacramental both parties must be validly baptized. If one of the parties to the marriage is Catholic then the marriage must also be a "Catholic" wedding (consent given before a Catholic minister).

If one party is not Christian, then the Bishop must grant a dispensation. When this dispensation is granted then the Catholic can marry a non-Christian and it will be considered a valid and recognized marriage, but not sacramental.

This, at least, is how I understand it for a case like yours.

So, get the dispensation from the Bishop, arrange with the Priest to have a Catholic Wedding (which can be done outside of a Mass I believe), get married. As long as all Catholic laws are followed, then your marriage will be valid and recognized in the Church.

Then once converted and baptized your marriage will become sacramental, but check with the pastor to see if anything needs to be done to recognize your marriage as fully sacramental.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

Footer Notes: This forum is for general questions on the faith. See specific Topic Forums below:
Spiritual Warfare, demons, the occult go to our Spiritul Warfare Q&S Forum.
Liturgy Questions go to our Liturgy and Liturgical Law Q&A Forum
Liturgy of the Hours (Divine Office) Questions go to our Divine Office Q&A Forum
Defenfing the Faith Questions go to our Defending the Faith Q&A Forum
Church History Questions go to our Church History Q&A Forum