Brother Ignatius:

Some thoughts for Hyde:

In 1971, a relationship begun in 1966 was dissolved. It was so devastating, I tried to commit suicide, but GOD had my father put a handgun up, empty, which he never did.

I wrote to myself. "Why is it so difficult for love to last, when it is so easy to begin? No one asks to fall in love; no one begins the day saying, “Today, I will fall in love.” How often do we ask, “Why did I fall in love?” The answer is in the questions that one asks.

Was it the image of the person that was so ethereal, that it did not seem to belong in this given place in time, and was for your eyes only? Was it a hidden strength that was yours for the asking? Was it the smile of innocence that caught your eye? Was it the fragrance of one’s hair, or the softness of one’s skin that ambushed your senses? Was it the beauty of the person within that only you could see? Was it the tenor of the voice that plucked the strings of your heart and caused it to soar through, the pages of the score from the symphony of life?

Was it just the simple presence of the one that took your breath away and would not give it back, unless it was to be shared? Was it the presence of the feeling that life was not possible without the person that was the object, or cause of all these feelings? Was it the one time exposure to the most potent and addictive drug known to mankind, love? Was it the embrace of the person that made you feel safe and protected from the emptiness of the world, or knowing no loneliness when held? Was it a general, non-specific, warm feeling that caused one’s insides to flutter whenever you were in that presence?

I asked Jesus at adoration, 32 years later, "Sweet Jesus, why did you allow my love and me to break up?" Six months later I was at adoration and gazing upon Jesus and this voice came out of no where. "My son, you asked my why. It was because of you."

Be assured! God listens to our pleas! BUT, we must do our part to overcome hurt.