Question:
Bro. Ignatius Mary,
I have been dealing with this problem for many years. I do fully understand the Lord’s Prayer which says, “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”. I know that if we are unwilling to forgive those who offend us, our Father in heaven will not forgive us.
As a Roman Catholic I know I must love everyone, even my enemies, but no one can ever convince me that I, as a Catholic, must continue to associate with those who continue to offend me, and, for that matter, continue to like them.
During His 3 year preaching ministry, Jesus was ridicule, called a liar, spat upon, and flogged. They even pressed a crown of thorns into His Head, one thorn even pierced His eye. They had Him tied to a post so that they could flog Him with a weapon that torn His Flesh from His Body, but Jesus still loved and forgave them.
After Jesus was beaten almost to death, they forced Him to carry this enormously heavy Cross-, the one that the Jews would nail Him to. The cross was so heavy that it torn into His Flesh exposing the bone of His shoulder. The reason for such unbelievable cruelty, cruelty demanded by the Jewish high priests, was because they feared that Jesus just might be the Messiah and they just might lose their position, power, and wealth.
Without question, regarding these so-called men of God, the word shameful pales before the word I would like to use, yet Jesus still loved them, forgave them, and was still willing to die for them, but I do not believe that Jesus still like them.
Yes, I truly believe that we must, as Luke tells us in Lk 17:3-4, be merciful, love and forgive all those who offend us. I also agree that our forgiveness must be given regardless of whether or not our offender asks for our forgiveness. And, I also believe that the right thing to do when someone offends you more than once, is to separate yourself from that person, forgive them, love them, and continue to pray for them.
Your council, as in the passed, as always been most helpful and greatly appreciated.
God Bless,
John R.
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Question Answered by
Dear John:
Sorry about the delay. On Saturday (6/16) we had hurricane force winds (around 100 mph). Nearly the whole city was blacked out. Power was restored to my house this morning (6/18). It has been like 100 degress heat index. Not a time for a power outage. There is also a tree on my roof, though no damage to the roof that I can tell. How I will get the tree off the house, I do not know. This sort of storm has not happened in this part of the country (Ottumwa, Iowa) since 1961, I believe, when remnants of Hurricane Carla swooped thorugh town. Calra was a Category 5 on today's scale and rated as the worse huricane to make landfall in U.S. history with an intensity rating of 42. Katrina is tied with two other huricanes for fourth place at 36 intensity points.
I praise God that you wish to forgive, as it is true that Jesus said that if we do not forgive, we will not be forgiven.
But, people tend to be unsure about the nature of forgiveness. We can dislike the person and still forgive him, we can avoid ever meeting the person again and still forgive them.
We have a pamphlet we give to our client about this: Dealing with Bitterness and Unforgiveness
This pamphlet discusses the true nature of forgiveness, which is a decision of will, not an emotion.
God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary
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