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Question Title Posted By Question Date
Rash Judgment Ryan Sunday, August 21, 2011

Question:

Hello. I was reading Patrick's answer and reflecting on the nature of rash judgment. I am wondering if something I recently did was rash judgment, though I do not think so. Regardless, I'd like your experienced opinion.

Essentially, I have a very disorderly friend, who by the way, is anti-Catholic to some extent, who has for his whole life been dowsed in drugs. Recently, he messed up his hands opening boxes in a job. He developed something like carpal tunnel and it somehow spread to his arms. He started taking oxycodone painkillers, but did not just take them in moderation. He has always been heavy into drugs, illegal and all, so he had been taking them in high doses every day, in addition to smoking marijuana and other heavier and serious drugs. He would always make excuses why he went overboard. I once told him to stop because the overdosage of painkillers was going to mess up his body. He retorted defensively and violently, "I want you to show me scientific evidence that this is the case." I told him I don't have it, but it was common sense.

Low and behold, his leg then got very messed up when he woke up one morning and he had to go to the hospital and all. I visited him. After, he got sent to rehab again. While in rehab I talked to him about it, telling him it's a last chance.

Anyway, he gets out of rehab and stays at a friend's house, then gets kicked out after he makes inappropriate advances at my friend's sister. Then I figure out he is staying with two lesbians who are using heroine, and he is taking cocaine, drinking heavy alcohol, taking ecstasy pills. I figured this out because a very concerned friend of mine ran into him, a person by the way who I know for a fact has NO reason to lie partly because he hardly knows this disorderly friend of mine, but said to me, "Ryan, I know he's your good friend. PLEASE do something, he's going to die if he keeps doing this. You have no idea how much he had on him. Please figure something out."

Then, the friend calls me days later and lets me know he got arrested. Then I decided to "do something." I told him:

"I have heard from a concerned source that since exiting rehab, you have been in possession and in entertainment of several drugs and living a questionable lifestyle. You also mentioned having been arrested, for which reason remains your business but it begs the logical following that you are not doing the right thing. If you continue down the path you are going, you will head to disaster, both corporal and spiritual. I am warning you again with the hope that you will finally reform and do away with these days. Thus, we are not to be hanging out until you shape up, fly sober, and prove it. If you do not reform, I will not be able to tolerate your company."

And more, but you get the jist. He responded violently, calling me a "self-righteous judgmental piece of $%^*"

Since I heard from someone, though it's true, was I rash?

Or would God approve of this?



Question Answered by

Dear Ryan:

From your narrative I can see no rash judgment. Your disorderly friend has a history that you well know. The friend who told you what was going on seems to have this information first hand. He told you because he knows that you are friends with the disorderly person and that you might be able to help. This is an act of compassion on his part to tell you.

Then you confronted the disorderly friend with this information and your concern for his physical and spiritual life. His, response, by the way is to be expected.

None of this is rash judgment or gossip. Now if your friend stopped me on the street ans told me about your disorderly friend, even if the information is true, that would be the sin of detraction since there is no reason for me to know this information as I do not know this person and thus not in a position to help.

There is a reason for you to know the information as you are a friend of the disorderly person and your other friend's motive in telling you was that he thought you could help.

So there is no rash judgment here, and no detraction.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary


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