Dear Alicia:

As a general rule a Christian ought not to use vulgar or bad language. We should set an example of excellence in deportment and language.

As for your question, you have mixed together several types of language.

A curse is to wish some form of adversity or misfortune upon another person. To do this is grave sin when done deliberately. Parents often curse they children, without actually intending a curse such as, "G.D. you Johnny, I told you to take the trash out six times." That particular curse is not only a curse but also taking the Lord's Name in vain -- a grave sin. But a curse is also language that does not take the Lord's name in vain such as in Joshua 6:26

At that time Joshua pronounced this solemn oath: “Cursed before the LORD is the one who undertakes to rebuild this city, Jericho:

   “At the cost of his firstborn son
   he will lay its foundations;
   at the cost of his youngest
   he will set up its gates.”

A curse can be simple without any "bad" words such as, "I hope you will be unhappy for the rest of your life."

Swearing, in this context, is profanity.  Profanity is abusive, vulgar, blasphemous, or irreverent language. Taking the Lord's name in vain is blasphemous. But, so is saying, "Jesus, Mary, Joseph" if it said in any other way that as a prayer. To be more specific I'll quote a few brief sections of the Catechism:

2160 "O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth" (Ps 8:1)!

2161 The second commandment enjoins respect for the Lord's name. The name of the Lord is holy.

2162 The second commandment forbids every improper use of God's name. Blasphemy is the use of the name of God, of Jesus Christ, of the Virgin Mary, and of the saints in an offensive way.

2163 False oaths call on God to be witness to a lie. Perjury is a grave offence against the Lord who is always faithful to his promises.

2164 "Do not swear whether by the Creator, or any creature, except truthfully, of necessity, and with reverence" (St. Ignatius of Loyola, Spiritual Exercises, 38).

2165 In Baptism, the Christian receives his name in the Church. Parents, godparents, and the pastor are to see that he be given a Christian name. The patron saint provides a model of charity and the assurance of his prayer.

2166 The Christian begins his prayers and activities with the Sign of the Cross: "in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen."

2167 God calls each one by name (cf. Isa 43:1).

From the teaching of the Catechism we can conclude that Blasphemy, which is inwardly or outwardly making utterance against God -- words of hatred, reproach, or defiance, speaking ill of God, failing respect toward Him in speech, and misusing God's name, is grave sin. Language against the Church, the saints, and sacred things also constituted blasphemy.

Some specific examples can be:

1. Abusing the name of God, or of any sacred name (such as the Name of Mary, the angels, and saints) is sin. When we stub our toe and say "God that hurts" or Jesus, Joseph, and Mary that hurt" we are most likely not really praying to God or asking for the saints intercessions. Rather the utterance is one of emotional release due to the pain and perhaps an act of self-control to avoid using curses. Another example is the phrase, "Well, God" (usually pronounced, "well Gaaawd") as an expression of "of course that is true" or "dah" etc. Unless we are truly evoking God or the saints names in prayer and devotion, this is abusing the name of God and the saints.
   
   
2. Misusing God's name by making promises in the name of God and breaking the promise is a sin. This is a form of making God a liar. "I promise on the Bible (in God's name) that I will pick you up at 3 o'clock." If we break this promise we make God a liar since we have brought God into our promise thereby making Him a guarantor of our promise. (Cf. 1 John 1:10)
   
   
3. Misusing God's name in oaths, or in magical uses is sin. Even if blasphemy is not intended, evoking God's name disrespectfully in an oath is sin, as is using God's name magically. "I promise God I will love you in the morning if you have sex with me tonight" is a misuse of an oath.
   
   
4. Using God's name magically is a COMMON practice. Often we throw out the name of Jesus as if it is a magical bullet that will ward off all evil. Or we use the name of Jesus like a talisman to get out way, instead of humbly submitting to God's will.
   
   
5. Making false oaths in God's name (lying under oath) is sin. This involves perjury or false witness or other lying under an oath. Like a promise, when we make an oath affirming truthfulness we invoke God's truthfulness as a pledge of our own. If we lie we are calling on God to be witness to a lie.
   
   
6. Using God's name for trivial matters is sin. This can involve using God's name in such trivial ways as "God, it is hot" when we are not really intending to talk to God about the heat. It can also be seen in the careless and causal use of God's name in humor.

The bottom line is that God's name is to be respected at the highest levels. St. Augustine said: "[God's] name is great when spoken with respect for the greatness of his majesty. God's name is holy when said with veneration and fear of offending him." And this principle applies also to Mary and all the Saints.

On my Brother Bubba Journal I posted a provocative commentary on this designed to help people think about their language entitled, Are you Blaspheming God and do not know it?

But that is not all. This principle applies to all of our names too. God calls everyone by name (Isa 43:1; Jn 10:3) Thus everyone's name is sacred. Our names deserves and demands respect as a sign of the dignity of the one who bears that name and who was created in dignity by God.

This is one reason why gossip, calumny, detraction, libel, slander, defamation of character, false witness, etc. are all such serious sins -- these sins destroy the good name of a person. These sins are a form of murder for they lead to or accomplish the death of the good reputation of one's name. We need to be real cautious in how we use other people's names.

In addition we learn from St. Ignatius of Loyola that we are not to swear not only by the name of God, but also by the name of any creature. All these things above constitute grave sin.

But what about "cussing" (that is, using cuss words that are not using God's name or the name of Mary or the Saints, or some other pejorative against the Church and sacred things)? Although the use of "cuss words" may not constitute grave sin, or perhaps not even venial sin in some cases, the use of such words may indeed be a violation of social conventions. As Christians we are to be counter-cultural. We are to set an example. We are to build up a society of civility and glory to our Lord. Using "cuss words" hardly "builds up". And often times those who are noted "cussers" are dominated by that habit. We are not to be dominated by anything other than Christ.

See a good article in This Rock magazine about this entitled, Soap Out that Mouth! In fact there is a whole website devoted to this subject. It is a secular site, but useful, called Cuss Control Academy. As Christians we need to be circumspect with our language, even if what we say is not sin. St. Paul says: (1 Cor 9:22) "To the weak I became weak, to win over the weak. I have become all things to all, to save at least some."

I remember one time just before I went into mendicant cloister I was working at Kinko's. I was known as the resident "religious nut" of course. One day in utter frustration over something I used a cuss word. The whole shoppe took notice: "John-Paul, boy, I never heard you use such language!!!" My Christian testimony received a small blot that day. Granted it was only a small blot since the mistake was not repeated, but it was a blot nevertheless. We have to be careful in using cuss words as it might scandalize others.

Bottomline: Cussing, cursing, and vulgarity are inconsistant with the Christian life.

Consider the following infallible teachings from the Bible:

(Phil. 4:8) "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."

How we speak reveals how we think. Vulgarity is hardly honorable, pure, lovely, gracious, excellent, or worthy of praise.

Christians are to live by a higher standard:

(Rom. 12:1) "I appeal to you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship."

And more to the point, Jesus said that,

(Matt. 15:11) "[it is] not what goes into the mouth defiles a man, but what comes out of the mouth, this defiles a man.”

And finally to the precise point:

1. St. Paul warned us, (Eph. 5:3-4) "But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not so much as be named among you, as becometh saints: Or obscenity, or foolish talking, or scurrility, which is to no purpose; but rather giving of thanks. [Scurrility means "The quality of being vulgar, coarse, or abusive; foul-mouthed."]
   
   
2. "Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer every one" (Col. 4:6).
   
   
3. "Do not accustom your mouth to lewd vulgarity, for it involves sinful speech" (Sir. 23:13).
   
   
4. "But now put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and foul talk from your mouth" (Col. 3:8).
   
   
5. "...set an example in speech and conduct, in love, in faith, in purity" (1 Tim. 4:12).
   
   
6. "The tongue is an unrighteous world among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the cycle of nature, and set on fire by hell" (Jas. 3:6).
   
   
7. "He who keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble" (Prov. 21:23).
   
   
8. "Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord, keep watch over the door of my lips" (Ps. 141:3).

Jesus said, (Matt. 15:10–11) "Hear and understand: Not what goes into the mouth defiles a man, but what comes out of the mouth, this defiles a man".

We need to remember the words of St. James, "If any one thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this man’s religion is vain" (Jas. 1:26).

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer" (Ps. 19:14).

I can post many more, but I think this makes the point that our words matter and that vulgarity has no place in civil society, let alone on the lips of Christians.

Hopefully, this gives you and your friends some reasons to be circumspect and take pause of the language you utter.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary