Dear Justin:

Well, it looks like your friend and his girlfriend are delusional and probably will not listen to reason.

The state law says they are not married unless they go through the legal process. The Church, including the Lutheran Church says they are not married when they do not have the ceremony in Church or least get married by a justice of the peace.

This is their private little delusion.

Marriage was instituted by God Himself. Marriage is a public act, not a private act. To live together without formal marriage is called concubinage.

So what they are proposes is making themselves concubines.

The Catholic Encyclopedia has an article on the Sacrament of Marriage. Since God instituted marriage as a Sacrament that, by definition, means that it must be administered within the Church.

If they do not do this, they will not be "married" in God's name, their "wedding vows" will be fraudulent, and they will not be married in the eyes of God. In fact, if they do this, they will be living in the sin of fornication and risking their souls to hell.

The Catholic Encyclopedia states that for marriage to be a sacrament it must:

• it must be a sacred religious rite instituted by Christ;
• this rite must be a sign of interior sanctification;
• it must confer this interior sanctification or Divine grace;
• this effect of Divine grace must be produced, not only in conjunction with the respective religious act, but through it.

This "religious rite" or "religious act" is meant "through the Church."

St. Paul describes the marriage in Ephesians 5:22-32. In verse 32 he says, "This mystery is a profound one, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church." The whole image of marriage is imaged by Christ's relationship with the Church (not the individual). There is absolutely no reference in the Bible or in the writings of the Church fathers that one can be married without the formal ceremony.

Mark 10:7-12 states:

For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.' So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder.

What God has joined together -- God administers His sacraments through the Church. Thus, those who spit on God have not been joined together by God, but upon their own authority and sin.

In fact, all cultures for the past 10,000 years or more, since the beginning of human culture, have never seen a couple as married unless they go through whatever rituals that culture has for marriage.

In all cultures, for all time, what they plan is called fornication. To call themselves married in this way, is a bald face lie.

Where "two or more are gathered in the name Jesus" refers to when two or more are gathered to do God's will. What they plan is spitting in God's face. What they plan is just plain sin. Thus, God will not be among them.

It is sad when people think they can tell God what to do, and thus go there own way.

Pray for them.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary