Dear Claire:

God loves you. You are not alone with sexual addictions. This problem is pandemic in our society.

The first step is that you MUST bring all sins to the Sacrament of Confession. If you have been holding back certain sins out of embarrassment, then any Confessions you have had have been invalid. Receiving the Eucharist with unconfessed grave sins on your soul is one of the worst sins -- sacrilege of the Blessed Sacrament.

Do not let embarrassment get in your way. Your soul depends upon it. If you die with deliberately unconfessed grave sins on your soul hell is the result. GET TO CONFESSION.

Without confession, then no other steps will work.

Confess any past sins that you have not already confessed, and keep "confessed up." That is, whenever you sin again, get to confession again, even if that means weekly confession. Even looking at pornography, by the way, is grave sin, that must be brought to the Sacrament of Confession.

The second step is to live a good devout Catholic life as best as you can -- daily prayers, attending Mass at least on Sunday each week, and on Holy Days of Obligation, going to Confession whenever needed, Bible reading and study, Adoration before the Blessed Sacrament, asking for the Intercessions of the Saints, doing good works, and all that it means to be a good and devout Catholic.

The third step to avoid the near occasion of sin. Discover your triggers and avoid those things or situations that triggers you to be tempted to sin.

The fourth step to help you avoid the near occasion of sin, and to help you overcome the compulsion to sexual sin, join a support group for those with sexual addictions. We have such a support group called the Catholic Support Group for Sexual Addiction Recovery. CSGSAR is the first group that went on the Internet to help Catholics with sexual addictions. Click on the link above and then when you get to the page click on the link entitled, "New Member Registration."

As for the compromising pictures that were unfortunately placed on the Internet, there is no good news. Once something is placed on the Internet there is no way to guarantee removal. Many times as a result of website rotating pictures off their sites to make room for more, or like when that one website took down the pictures, the pictures may eventually disappear. But, all it takes is for someone who downloaded the pictures to place them back on the Internet for the whole thing start up again.

Ultimately, there is no way to guarantee the pictures will ever be off the Internet. You will most likely have to life with it. It is a consequence of your decision to send such pictures to people.

This is not the end of the world for you. There are former porno stars who have their images in tens of thousands places (even millions of places) that will never go away, who make a break from pornography and go on to live productive lives and even get married and live a normal family life.

In your case, we are talking about a few pictures. If any man holds this indiscretion against you he is not a man. There is every reason to hope for a man to come along whom you will love and he will love you.

Hope is yours. Put this behind you and go on.

As for the sexual addiction, you do need to work hard on that. Support groups like ours can be very helpful. In some cases professional counseling or even medication can be helpful to help in overcoming the addiction.

You have hope with this too. God understands your situation and He loves you.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary