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Question Title Posted By Question Date
What to do when God does not answer prayers Chas Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Question:

Dear Brother
Do you know of some book or some website that I can give to one of my nephews and his wife who stopped going to church? The reason was that they have a son who is now 13 years old and was diagnosed as bi-polar at a very young age. It can get pretty severe at times. They said they gave up on prayer because God has abandoned and forgotten about them. They say God didn’t listen to their prayers to heal their son. I know he does but we don't always get the answers we want. I pray daily for them and for their son. Even though I don’t see my nephew that often maybe once a year I want to give him something to be able to accept God’s will. The boy was baptized but has not made his first communion and I want to help them as much as possible. I know that when he was just a little boy it was very difficult when attending mass because of his very short attention span and would be quite a distraction. The boy has been bounced back and forth between so many schools in different towns, school districts, and special schools and none have really help him. He has to be under heavy medication in order to be under control. The doctors have tried all types of medication but after a while they stop working. The boy cries at times questioning why he is different from other kids and why he can’t control his temper. He realizes, after he calms, down that he has done wrong but cant understand why he is like that.
Can you help?

Thank you in advance.



Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM

Dear Chas:

I am sorry to hear about this. If they will read a book, which is probably doubtful, I recommend Making Sense Out of Suffering by Peter Kreeft and also The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis.

A review on Amazon by Oswald Sobrino of CatholicAnalysis.blogspot.com writes:

Peter Kreeft has written an intellectually stimulating book on something we all have to face: suffering. He does so by giving us clues from philosophy, the arts, and the Bible to the meaning of suffering. As a Catholic Christian, Kreeft finds the ultimate meaning of suffering in the life, death, and resurrection of Christ. It is a book worth reading and re-reading. In my view, his most striking insight is how in literature, including the biblical story of Job, the protagonist must undergo suffering before the final triumph of good over evil. He urges us to view ourselves as protagonists in the midst of our own life stories. If good finally triumphs, as Christians believe, then the story is worthwhile, even with its inevitable suffering. Like a true philosopher, he also includes a thought-provoking chapter on why modernity can't understand suffering. This is a book that will appeal to all Christians, Catholic or non-Catholic, and to all persons searching to understand the meaning of suffering.

In the Amazon Review, Jill Heatherly writes: The Problem of Pain answers the universal question, "Why would an all-loving, all-knowing God allow people to experience pain and suffering?" Master Christian apologist C.S. Lewis asserts that pain is a problem because our finite, human minds selfishly believe that pain-free lives would prove that God loves us. In truth, by asking for this, we want God to love us less, not more than he does. "Love, in its own nature, demands the perfecting of the beloved; that the mere 'kindness' which tolerates anything except suffering in its object is, in that respect at the opposite pole from Love." In addressing "Divine Omnipotence," "Human Wickedness," "Human Pain," and "Heaven," Lewis succeeds in lifting the reader from his frame of reference by artfully capitulating these topics into a conversational tone, which makes his assertions easy to swallow and even easier to digest. Lewis is straightforward in aim as well as honest about his impediments, saying, "I am not arguing that pain is not painful. Pain hurts. I am only trying to show that the old Christian doctrine that being made perfect through suffering is not incredible. To prove it palatable is beyond my design." The mind is expanded, God is magnified, and the reader is reminded that he is not the center of the universe as Lewis carefully rolls through the dissertation that suffering is God's will in preparing the believer for heaven and for the full weight of glory that awaits him there. While many of us naively wish that God had designed a "less glorious and less arduous destiny" for his children, the fortune lies in Lewis's inclination to set us straight with his charming wit and pious mind. 

We will certainly be in prayer for your nephew and his wife, and their child.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary


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