Dear Rose:

Thank you for your kind words about our ministry. Indeed we receive considerably flak from the evil one, as does anyone who dares to perform ministry to the greater glory of God.

I praise God for your desire to remain loyal to the faith. In this day and age in which such things as waiting to be married before having sex is considered silly and other morally improper things are considered normal, it is difficult for a person, especially a young person, to remain loyal to the faith. I want to encourage you in your faith. God will reward you for your loyalty and you will be blessed. And when we do fall God is so loving to provide us with the Sacrament of Confession to restore us to grace and to His friendship.

You do not sound "goody-goody" in the pejorative sense. You sound like a fine and faithful young woman. That is to be praised. If others think you are "goody-goody" they only show themselves to be "bady-bady"

Also, your question is not a waste of time, but is an excellent question and one that we must all answer for ourselves in order to cope with this evil world and the negative influence of our peers and culture. Christians are to be counter-cultural. As a counter-cultural people we will be persecuted by the world. We must accept that and see it as a privilege to be persecuted for Christ's sake, and to offer up our suffering to God for the salvation of the souls of our persecutors.

We live in the world and most people, even most Christians unfortunately, have a worldly mindset and not the mind of Christ. So-called, "liberal" Catholics are some of the most worldly of all. St. Francis de Sales, the great doctor of the Church, in his book Introduction to the Devout Life, teaches Philothea (who represents us all) about this worldly mind. Keep in mind this was published in 1609 yet is as pertinent today as it was then:

Does anyone fail to see that the world is an unjust judge, gracious and well disposed to its own children but harsh and rigorous towards the children of God?

We can never please the world unless we lose ourselves together with it. It is so demanding that it can't be satisfied. ... It is true Philothea, that if we are ready to laugh, play cards, or dance with the world in order to please it, it will be scandalized at us, and if we don't, it will accuse us of hypocrisy or melancholy. If we dress well, it will attribute it to some plan we have, and if we neglect our dress, it will accuse of us being cheap and stingy. Good humor will be called frivolity and mortification sullenness. Thus the world looks at us with an evil eye and we can never please it. It exaggerates our imperfections and claims they are sins, turns our venial sins into mortal sins and changes our sins of weakness into sins of malice.

"Charity is kind," says St. Paul, but the world on the contrary is evil. "Charity thinks no evil," but the world always thinks evil and when it can't condemn our acts it will condemn our intentions. ... Whatever we do, the world will wage war on us. If we stay a long time in the confessional, it will wonder how we can have so much to say; if we stay only a short time, it will say we haven't told everything. It will watch all our actions and at a single little angry word it will protest that we can't get along with anyone. To take care of our own interests will look like avarice, while meekness will look like folly. ...

Let us give up this blind world, Philothea. Let it cry out at us as long as it pleases, like a cat cries out to frighten birds in the daytime. Let us be firm in our purposes and unswerving in our resolutions. Perseverance will proof whether we have sincerely sacrificed ourselves to God and dedicated ourselves to a devout life. ...Hypocrisy cannot last long but is quickly dissipated like rising smoke, whereas true virtue is always firm and constant. It is no little assistance for a sure start in devotion if we first suffer criticism and calumny because of it. In this way we escape the danger of pride and vanity... We are crucified to the world and the world must be crucified to us. The world holds us to be fools; let us hold it to be mad.

I highly recommend that you and everyone get a copy of this book by St. Francis de Sales. The saint wrote this book specifically to the laity to help them to pursue holiness.

The point of this narrative is that those with worldly minds will find a reason to criticize the devout no matter what we do. Thus, as the saint says, if they consider us fools, let us consider them mad.

In terms of how to handle this pressure, influence, and persecution we need to keep our eyes on Christ. Remember the story of St. Peter walking on the water (Matt 14:26-32)? As long as Peter kept his eyes on Jesus he was able to walk on water. Peter, a mere human, was able to actually walk on water. But, when Peter began to see the storm around him he began to sink.

Do not look upon the storms around you, rather keep your eyes focued on Christ and you too can walk upon the stormy waters of your campus.

The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, Eucharistic Adoration, prayer, devotion, and offering up your suffering to Christ are the primary ways to deal with this.

Rejoice in your persecution. It is a great privilege to suffer for the cause of Christ, to share in His suffering. Our suffering is redemptive and efficacious to strength our faith and devotion. Do not run from the persecution but embrace it, make it the fuel of your devotion.

As for a spiritual director, I would recommend the book, "Seeking Spiritual Direction: How to Grow the Divine Life Within" by Father Thomas Dubay. This book will instruct you on what a Spiritual Director is and is not, how to find a director, and what to do if you cannot find one.

Once you have read that book, then you can begin to look for a director. Be VERY careful. Many "professional" spiritual directors, especially those at Retreat Centers, are liberal or otherwise not that orthodox to the faith.

Unfortunately, even ancient orders these days have often lost their orthodoxy to one degree or another. And even if the order or association itself is loyal and orthodox, a spiritual director coming from that order or association may not be. It is a sad state of affairs.

Check with any monasteries in the area. But, again, be careful. You need to "interview" any potential Spiritual Director to see if they are really loyal to the Church with "marker" questions that can reveal their level of orthodoxy.

The Discalced Carmelites (OCD, not the O.Carm.) may be a good choice, but still be careful.  Some Benedictines and Jesuits can be good spiritual directors, but again be careful.

If there is a chapter of a lay order of Discalced Carmelites (OCDS) you might check with them if you are interested in more than spiritual direction but a community to help you consecrate yourself to God. We, that is, the Order of the Legion of St. Michael, is another choice for a community that can help you consecrate yourself. We can do this long distance without having a local chapter which is especially helpful for those folks who do not live near any loyal and orthodox groups.

We will certainly be in prayer for you. God will reward you for your loyalty and resolve.

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

2 Cor 12:10  "For which cause I please myself in my infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ. For when I am weak, then am I powerful."