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Question Title	Posted By	Question Date
disheartened by "devoutly nominal Catholics"	Abijah	Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Question: I was raised as a conservative Lutheran, but I've been surrounded by Catholicism at various times in my life. To make a long story short, I'll probably convert to Catholicism as I learn even more about it and as God helps me clear some internal spiritual hurdles, but almost no one knows that. But anyway, that's all just background for my questions. There is a family that I interact with often. They are "devoutly nominal Catholics", the ultimate in hypocrisy in my opinion. They observe the no-meat-on-Friday tradition during Lent, they celebrate (with much materialism) Easter and Christmas, and that's about it. They also attended weekly Mass until their children were confirmed, and this earlier apparent obedience to the Church was instrumental to me wanting to learn more about Catholicism. And now the children are grown and not that Catholic. Over the years, "Catholic" acquaintances and the children's own parents passively or actively ridiculed away any thoughts of imposing strict Catholic ideals on all facets of life, from daily interaction to fighting abortion legality. The family's actual religion appears to be one of lazy, lowest-common-denominator morality with an allowance for occasional iniquity. I've sometimes tried to indirectly instruct them on how to be proper Catholics, but nothing ever sticks. Also, it is in the nature of the family to lash out at me if I were to even hint at any un-Catholic-ness on their part. Is there anything I can do for this family besides pray for them? They sadden me to tears, and I am concerned for their souls. And how do I not get discouraged by them and everyone else who has their mindset?
Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM Dear Abijah: Sorry for the delay in answering. I am happy to hear of your interests in the Catholic Church. We will be in prayer for your discernment on this. In considering the Catholic Church, or any church for that matter, we cannot look to the foibles of its members. As one old Baptist preacher once said, "The Church is a hospital for sinners, not a resort for saints." There are many Christians who live marginal faith lives. We need, however, to always look to Jesus. It is Jesus that makes the Church holy, not its members. As members of Christ's Body, we are family. As with any family there are the lazy relatives, the mentally off-balance relatives, the hypocrite relatives, etc. The problem family members may be problems, but the family is still intact. So it is with the Church. As for what to do when family or friends have marginal faith or our nominal in the practice of their faith (which St. James says is the same thing) depends upon who they are and how open they are to discussion of the matter. We have to be careful about "nagging". Nagging usually draws people away from what you are asking them to do. We must remember that it is the job of the Holy Spirit to convince someone. Our job is merely to present the message. One idea, if they will do it, is to listen to tape presentations of Scott Hahn. Scott is a great speaker who can inspire nominal Catholics into flame. No guarantees of course, but Scott does have a tendency to inspire people to a deeper level of faith. You might start with Superabundant Family Love - Living The Faith In The Family - Dr. Hahn offers practical teachings for living a Catholic life with greater joy in our homes and in the workplace. His words will stir up love's fire in your heart, calling you to live the magnificent mystery of self-donation with your spouse, your children, and your family members., 3 audio cassettes. Other tapes and videos are located here. Also, in our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog is a prayer for a Wayward Catholic. While these people may not be "wayward" in the classical sense, it sounds like they need to return to the faith as it is suppose to be. You can modify the prayer in any way you need to fit the situation. That is also true with any of the other prayers that might be helpful. Keep praying for them and live the good Catholic life, even now before you are Catholic (except for the Sacraments of course). Be a role model. St. Francis of Assisi once said, "We should preach the Gospel, and sometimes use words." God Bless, Bro. Ignatius Mary Footer Notes: This forum is for general questions on the faith. See specific Topic Forums below: Spiritual Warfare, demons, the occult go to our Spiritul Warfare Q&S Forum. Liturgy Questions go to our Liturgy and Liturgical Law Q&A Forum Liturgy of the Hours (Divine Office) Questions go to our Divine Office Q&A Forum Defenfing the Faith Questions go to our Defending the Faith Q&A Forum Church History Questions go to our Church History Q&A Forum

Question Title

Posted By

Question Date

disheartened by "devoutly nominal Catholics"

Abijah

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Question:

I was raised as a conservative Lutheran, but I've been surrounded by Catholicism at various times in my life. To make a long story short, I'll probably convert to Catholicism as I learn even more about it and as God helps me clear some internal spiritual hurdles, but almost no one knows that. But anyway, that's all just background for my questions.

There is a family that I interact with often. They are "devoutly nominal Catholics", the ultimate in hypocrisy in my opinion. They observe the no-meat-on-Friday tradition during Lent, they celebrate (with much materialism) Easter and Christmas, and that's about it. They also attended weekly Mass until their children were confirmed, and this earlier apparent obedience to the Church was instrumental to me wanting to learn more about Catholicism.

And now the children are grown and not that Catholic. Over the years, "Catholic" acquaintances and the children's own parents passively or actively ridiculed away any thoughts of imposing strict Catholic ideals on all facets of life, from daily interaction to fighting abortion legality.

The family's actual religion appears to be one of lazy, lowest-common-denominator morality with an allowance for occasional iniquity. I've sometimes tried to indirectly instruct them on how to be proper Catholics, but nothing ever sticks. Also, it is in the nature of the family to lash out at me if I were to even hint at any un-Catholic-ness on their part.

Is there anything I can do for this family besides pray for them? They sadden me to tears, and I am concerned for their souls. And how do I not get discouraged by them and everyone else who has their mindset?

Question Answered by Bro. Ignatius Mary, OLSM

Dear Abijah:

Sorry for the delay in answering.

I am happy to hear of your interests in the Catholic Church. We will be in prayer for your discernment on this.

In considering the Catholic Church, or any church for that matter, we cannot look to the foibles of its members. As one old Baptist preacher once said, "The Church is a hospital for sinners, not a resort for saints."

There are many Christians who live marginal faith lives. We need, however, to always look to Jesus. It is Jesus that makes the Church holy, not its members.

As members of Christ's Body, we are family. As with any family there are the lazy relatives, the mentally off-balance relatives, the hypocrite relatives, etc. The problem family members may be problems, but the family is still intact. So it is with the Church.

As for what to do when family or friends have marginal faith or our nominal in the practice of their faith (which St. James says is the same thing) depends upon who they are and how open they are to discussion of the matter.

We have to be careful about "nagging". Nagging usually draws people away from what you are asking them to do. We must remember that it is the job of the Holy Spirit to convince someone. Our job is merely to present the message.

One idea, if they will do it, is to listen to tape presentations of Scott Hahn. Scott is a great speaker who can inspire nominal Catholics into flame. No guarantees of course, but Scott does have a tendency to inspire people to a deeper level of faith.

You might start with Superabundant Family Love - Living The Faith In The Family - Dr. Hahn offers practical teachings for living a Catholic life with greater joy in our homes and in the workplace. His words will stir up love's fire in your heart, calling you to live the magnificent mystery of self-donation with your spouse, your children, and your family members., 3 audio cassettes.

Other tapes and videos are located here.

Also, in our Spiritual Warfare Prayer Catalog is a prayer for a Wayward Catholic. While these people may not be "wayward" in the classical sense, it sounds like they need to return to the faith as it is suppose to be. You can modify the prayer in any way you need to fit the situation. That is also true with any of the other prayers that might be helpful.

Keep praying for them and live the good Catholic life, even now before you are Catholic (except for the Sacraments of course). Be a role model. St. Francis of Assisi once said, "We should preach the Gospel, and sometimes use words."

God Bless,
Bro. Ignatius Mary

Footer Notes: This forum is for general questions on the faith. See specific Topic Forums below:
Spiritual Warfare, demons, the occult go to our Spiritul Warfare Q&S Forum.
Liturgy Questions go to our Liturgy and Liturgical Law Q&A Forum
Liturgy of the Hours (Divine Office) Questions go to our Divine Office Q&A Forum
Defenfing the Faith Questions go to our Defending the Faith Q&A Forum
Church History Questions go to our Church History Q&A Forum